little white's secrets

I wanted so badly to post something most people don’t want to read on facebook.  Something personal.  Something I’m craving.  But I no longer post anything really personal on facebook.  It has become purely a self-promotion site.  For me, for everyone.  Those really annoying posts that everyone loves to hate (google search “annoying facebook status” and you will know what I’m talking about) are a common example of why I no longer post anything unless I feel it is funny, moving, or making a point.

Today I wanted to write so badly about someone that I am missing.  Because hardly anyone on facebook would know what I’m talking about anyway, I may as well write about it in an anonymous fashion on my anonymous blog.

I met this person while I was on vacation, in a far away place.  I never expected to meet someone like this.  If anything, I expected it to begin and end similar to a summer love - bittersweet.  But it turned out so much more than I ever could have imagined.  I’m not one to fall head over heels.  In fact, I usually second guess my actions and decisions the second I make them.  So for me to open up so deeply for him and to have him do the same for me was just.. well.. a breath of fresh air. 

So before you think I have found my fairy tale ending, think again.  He lives 2.4k miles away from me.  And to top things off, he doesn’t have regular access to a phone or internet.  Just my luck.  For someone who is seemingly addicted to the interwebs, I find this to be terribly frustrating but I am coping.  Sort of.

So today I am craving a conversation with him.  Dying to tell him how my day went.  Yearning to know how his Dad is doing (he was admitted to the hospital yesterday).

But I have to wait.

So this post is to remind myself that even though I can’t talk to him, I am loved.  He would if he could.  If only we weren’t so far apart.  February cannot get here fast enough. <3